#eevblog - 2019-10-10 - AustNet Archive Project

// #eevblog — 2019-10-10

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« 2019-10-09 2019-10-11 »
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47:03 <EEVBlog> New EEVBlog Tweet: RT @KingCyberJacob: @eevblog I've invented a new game just for you Dave, it's called "Count the safety issues"! https://t.co/xcyBakGCaf
02:42 <coppice> that one is good for a laugh
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21:17 <EEVBlog> New EEVBlog Tweet: Nice step forward in repairability @Microsoft It would be awesome if you released the schematics and boardview to enable component level repair. Like this tweet if you agree. https://t.co/0a4LANnFdZ
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48:49 <T3sl4> Ampera: i found you a tshirt https://i.imgur.com/nTMMoq5.jpg
49:04 <Ampera> ok
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55:08 <EEVBlog> New EEVBlog Tweet: Fire alarm again #TweetBeforeExit
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59:52 <Halcyon_> Hey Ampera
00:01 <Ampera> hullo
00:05 <Halcyon_> How's you?
01:09 <EEVBlog> New EEVBlog Tweet: "Keeping a close eye on emerging technologies." LOL, we should have moved to nuclear subs decades ago. If anyone needs it, it's us, why, let me show you a handy map @lindareynoldswa Submarines may be switched to nuclear, says navy vice admiral https://t.co/4Vjgs3mHaQ https://t.co/KAitPzmYsD
02:33 <Ampera> Very very terrible
02:58 <Ampera> (My keyboard literally just broke as you said that)
03:18 <Ampera> I haven't slept at all this night and I have to leave in about 90 minutes
03:34 <steve30> Halcyon_, I went swimming yesterday
05:33 * steve30 dangles some speedos in front of Halcyon_ 
06:48 <Ampera> This, in particular, is a day I simply wish to get over with.
08:08 * steve30 cuddles Ampera 
08:36 <Ampera> :)
08:47 <Ampera> I'm loading up on Dr. Pepper, hopefully the caffeine will help me.
09:00 <Ampera> Thank fuck I do not have a chemistry lab today.
09:15 <steve30> I should go and do some more work in the garage
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56:12 <Ampera> aaaaaa I'm gonna fucking die today
56:23 <K> hello
56:23 <EEVBlog> Hello there, K!
56:26 <K> yay
56:34 <Ampera> first time I ever straight up never slept an entire night, and then just went to fuckin school
56:35 <K> when is that going to happen, Ampera?
56:48 <K> ah, soon, then.
56:52 <Ampera> very very soon
57:04 <Ampera> I leave in 30 minutes. I'm gonna be fucking dead.
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59:59 <Ampera> I had last night what I can only now describe as a manic episode.
00:33 <Ampera> Like a light switch I became suddenly and violently angry and depressed. I'm currently, and for the first time, 1 day banned from the AfterNET #eevblog because of it
00:52 <Halcyon_> Sorry I'm back, was making dinner
01:08 <Halcyon_> What happened Ampera?
01:21 <Halcyon_> Why did you get banned?
01:29 <Ampera> I don't know if I'm bipolar, it would make plenty of sense as there is a distinct family history, but I'm currently inclined to think that while I might have mild bipolar depression, it's being aggravated by severe mental stress.
01:45 <Ampera> lol, cause I called jspiros out on his shit, and got violent about it
02:02 <Halcyon_> Well he does talk a lot of shit and has a history of being sensitive about it
02:07 <Ampera> I was venting as my poor retarded mind usually does, and said that any problem I try to fix I feel like I physically can't
02:09 <Halcyon_> Doesn't seem like a reason to ban you
02:31 <Ampera> his response to that was effectively, well if you simply try harder to not be broken, you'll probably end up being a reasonable healthy person some day
02:40 <Halcyon_> Yep, just like that
02:43 <Ampera> sort of like telling a depressed person to cheer up
02:50 <Ampera> so I called him some shit, and he banned me for a day
03:16 <Halcyon_> This is probably not something you can solve yourself, but you already know this
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03:28 <K> be more happy!!! smile!!!
03:42 <Ampera> I have a strange mental mechanism, one I've placed within myself (as strange as it sounds) that's intended to be a failsafe in the event my mind reaches a critical breaking point.
04:25 <Ampera> The general point is that it's a mental suggestion strong enough to override any problems I might be having should they get too severe (I won't go into the technology of it, but it's effectively one half of my mind telling the other half it's in trouble.
04:35 <Halcyon_> The thing is though, resiliance gets better as you get older. What might be critical now, might just be an annoyance some time down the track.
04:37 <Ampera> That activated last night.
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05:10 <Halcyon_> But why were you "in trouble" ?
05:12 <Ampera> I consider that something incredibly serious for it to happen like that, so I genuinely am in a mode to seriously actually fix things.
05:29 <Ampera> As I said, I believe I was going into a stress-induced manic episode (manic depression)
05:30 <Halcyon_> I hope it wasn't because jspiros said something stupid
05:46 <Ampera> No that more catalyzed it.
06:16 <Ampera> Stress in my life has reached levels it has never been at before, and I am finding almost everything to be going wrong in any way it can.
06:20 <Ampera> Usually in a way I can't fix.
06:30 <Ampera> or at least in a way I believe I can't fix
06:47 <Ampera> So I need to figure out a way to resolve those issues, somehow.
08:58 <Halcyon_> *hugs*
09:19 <Halcyon_> I honestly don't know what else I can do to help, so I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing.
10:04 <Ampera> (just pming with DogWomble a bit)
10:12 <Halcyon_> He's a good guy
10:22 <Halcyon_> Also, have you tried the ramen yet?
10:22 <Ampera> As I said to him, I know what my issues are, and I know the things I could do to fix them.
10:34 <Halcyon_> It will probably help take your mind off things for a short while ;-)
10:45 <Ampera> No not yet, I haven't really eaten much since I got it, and haven't had, let's just say mental access to the kitchen for a while.
10:53 <Halcyon_> Copy
11:01 <Halcyon_> Is SHE still hanging around?
11:07 <Ampera> Gone for the moment.
11:13 <Halcyon_> \o/
11:32 <Ampera> I am genuinely considering exercising whatever power I may have to get rid of her, because it's nearing the point that if I don't, I may die.
11:47 <Halcyon_> Could you live with mum?
11:53 <Ampera> No.
12:21 <Halcyon_> A part of me wishes I lived there
12:23 <Ampera> She lives in a one room apartment.
12:31 <Halcyon_> At least we could hang out and you'd have a place to go
12:35 <Ampera> A part of me wishes you lived here too, that way you could know what a free country is like
12:41 <Halcyon_> Oh har har
13:18 <Ampera> One thing is absolutely without a doubt sure.
13:21 <Ampera> I will take the piss to my grave.
14:06 <Ampera> I will be consulting people I trust as to better understand my options, explain the true severity of the situation to people. I don't have much I can do, but I think it might be the time to start making the tough decisions in life.
14:36 <Halcyon_> So you should, piss-taking is healthy
15:05 <Ampera> I drank almost an entire 2L of Dr. Pepper in one go, don't talk to me about piss
15:20 <Halcyon_> k
15:35 <Halcyon_> Sorry that 'k' was from Jerry
15:39 <Halcyon_> He is on my keyboard
15:53 <Ampera> As a note to myself, I should really get some emergency caffeine pills
16:05 <Halcyon_> For college?
16:07 <Ampera> because I can't drink coffee without nausea
16:08 <Ampera> aye
16:34 <Halcyon_> Welcome to my world :-)
16:41 <Halcyon_> Except that I drink coffee and tea
17:08 <Ampera> My dad's girlfriend is simply one of my problems. I have many more. I think my schoolwork's quality is slipping.
17:23 <Ampera> I'm getting 80's and 85's on in-class assignments, and while they don't count much, they are stupid mistakes I shouldn't be making.
17:37 <Ampera> Same with my writing submissions, which despite getting a 90, is full of absolutely horrific mistakes.
18:12 <Ampera> I think that's mostly caused by stress and being unable to focus on school.
18:34 <Ampera> I also have my gender issues, but I have considered that to be remarkably unsolvable, particularly in my present state.
19:10 <Halcyon_> Is there some kind of service you can access through college?
19:14 <Ampera> lol
19:20 <Halcyon_> I don't know what colleges/uni's are like there
19:22 <Ampera> that's funnier than you might think I find it.
19:31 <Ampera> My college, in terms of that, is an SJW shithole.
19:36 <Halcyon_> SJW?
19:47 <Ampera> I wouldn't trust them if they told me I had blood in my veins and skin on my hands.
20:06 <Halcyon_> Hm
20:14 <Ampera> Social Justice Warrior, general ultra liberal assholes who will tell me to join political groups.
20:29 <Halcyon_> See is this shit and your law enforcement and medical system that really disappoints me about the US
20:35 <Halcyon_> You guys SHOULD have all these things
21:19 <Ampera> To be honest, our therapists aren't any worse than yours in general, and I agree that if the solution is talk to someone for 100 bucks an hour (whoever may be paying for it), that it shouldn't be offered
21:21 <Ampera> at least not to me
21:42 <Ampera> I have a severe distrust of mental health authority, like, I fucking hate therapists and social workers.
22:02 <Ampera> I genuinely think that the majority of them are scum and trash that do more damage to innocent suffering people than they do good.
22:39 <Ampera> In other news I stepped on my surface pro's type cover and cracked it
22:55 <Ampera> so now the trackpad doesn't click right and it's properly on its last legs.
23:37 <Ampera> another problem is I am horrifically unorganized and unclean to the point where it's an immense problem to me, but my stress (and potentially depression) is making it hard for me to get up and clean and organize things.
24:33 <Ampera> I'm thinking of implementing a highly granular scheduling system in 15 minute blocks, and to properly dedicate time I should be spending on important things to those important things
24:37 <Ampera> like cleaning and schoolwork
25:10 <Halcyon_> Can I buy you a new one?
25:14 <Ampera> Anyways, I need to go. I'll be back in about 30 minutes
25:18 <Ampera> can talk about that in a bit.
26:27 <Halcyon_> Yes
26:35 <Halcyon_> Then I have questions for you (tech related)
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