// #eevblog — 2019-07-04
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00:33:58 Nick: steve30000 is now known as steve30
00:44:58 <Nothing\> so i've been thinking, in regards to push/pull style voltage inverters, why do they settle for just 1 positive and 1 negative level and leave it at that, i was fiddling around and came up with a circuit that works the same way, but approximates a sine wave much more closely
00:45:01 <Nothing\> https://i.imgur.com/1HmNin2.png
00:45:38 <Nothing\> of course this particular circuit needs some work as the waveform leaves a lot to be desired, but you can hopefully get an idea of what i was going for with this
00:46:09 <Nothing\> and i think in reality it would probably be better to use a series of voltage references, maybe an RC network like an a flash ADC rather than a bunch of voltage sources in series
00:46:44 <Nothing\> i just wanted to throw something together to get the idea across
00:47:09 <Nothing\> dunno why i shorted q5 and q6 but it needs to be rewired
00:47:42 <Nothing\> incidentally i figured out how to make a stair step generator while i was working this out
00:47:55 <DHess_US> Some inverters do work that way.
00:48:17 <DHess_US> But generally only at low powers and they unbalance the battery.
00:48:19 <Nothing\> really? it seems a bit bulky to me
00:48:40 <Nothing\> yeah i was thinking each one of those connections is gonna require at least one, probably more FETs in parallel
00:49:42 <Nothing\> that's interesting though, all of the push/pull style inverters i've seen just have the one positive level, then goes to ground, then the one negative level, which to me doesn't seem to approximate a sine wave very closely at all, but i guess as long as the load isn't inductive
00:49:53 <Nothing\> although if ave can run an angle grinder on one it can't be THAT bad
00:50:26 <Nothing\> er i guess it's reactivity, not just induction that messes with it
00:55:01 <Nothing\> oh man, i found a hack for new super mario bros on the wii, this is probably the best hack i've ever played of any game, i actually prefer it to the original
00:55:54 <Nothing\> perfectly designed levels with more challenge than the original, but not too much, one of those full overhaul type hacks, new levels, worlds, environments, enemies, everything
00:56:15 <Nothing\> it's too bad more hacks like this don't exist for the wii, there are a bunch of hacks of new smb, but it'd be nice to see something similar for mario galaxy
00:57:10 <DHess_US> The peak voltage is 170 volts just like a sine wave and the pulse width is adjusted so the RMS value is 120 volts.
00:57:28 <DHess_US> That is how a "modified sine" inverter works.
01:09:45 <Nothing\> ah so to a resistive load, it doesn't look much different
01:10:08 <Nothing\> but those sharp rise/fall times would cause problems with reactive loads
01:10:36 <DHess_US> It doesn't look any different to a resistive load or a rectifier followed by a capacitor like in a switching power supply.
01:10:59 <DHess_US> Inductive loads have the most trouble with it.
01:20:24 <Nothing\> man wtf, i've been playing the hell out of terraria ever since i got it on my ps3, but i just found out they haven't updated the ps3 version in ages, they're claiming it can't handle the new updates, i dunno how it can't handle new items but this seems to be a running theme in ps3 games
01:20:52 <Nothing\> i had the same problem with diablo 3, i loved the game, played the hell out of it, then found out it's missing significant amounts of content compared to every other version
01:21:33 <Nothing\> makes me feel like what's the point of even playing, one day i'll get a ps4 and be able to play the full games, so why put so much time into a partially completed game when i'm just gonna have to start over again anyways
01:21:41 <Nothing\> le sigh
01:44:53 <DHess_US> That's what you get for being a console peasant.
01:46:31 <Nothing\> i'd have a pc if i could
01:46:34 Quit: Lartza ([email protected]) Quit: Quit
01:46:43 <Nothing\> i use a ps3 out of necessity, not because i like it
01:47:04 <desu> you're on irc on the ps3?
01:47:26 <Nothing\> no, i'm using a pi
01:47:37 <desu> oh
01:47:46 <desu> yeah typing with a ps3 controller lol
01:47:50 <desu> fuck that
01:47:50 <Nothing\> although i could irc on the ps3 through a web based irc client
01:48:03 <Nothing\> actually, when i use youtube on my tv i have to type with the mouse
01:48:34 <Nothing\> and thank heavens i can even use a mouse, otherwise i'd be using the cursor buttons on the remote, and it's just a plain IR remote so it's slow as balls
01:49:13 <Nothing\> and instead of scrolling through elements on a web page, the cursor keys move an on-screen cursor about one pixel per button press, it's awful
01:49:53 <Nothing\> i need a kvm switch or something for my keyboard on my pi so i can switch it to the tv easily, or just a really long usb extension cord which for some reason no friggin stores here seem to sell
01:50:09 <Nothing\> they don't sell usb extension cords period, i musta checked half a dozen places, it's pathetic
01:50:55 <Nothing\> i dunno what's up with not being able to find fairly common items around here, i had the same problem trying to find graph paper
01:51:16 <Nothing\> i checked about 5 or 6 different stores to no avail, then i finally found some at staples, for fucking $15 a pad, wtf
01:51:18 Join: Lartza ([email protected]) to #EEVblog
01:51:32 <Nothing\> seriously how does graph paper cost $15, it's paper
01:52:41 <DHess_US> I used to just print my own.
01:52:50 <Nothing\> it's disgusting how much stores mark up the crap they sell, i saw an electronics kit at the surplus store in the winter, it was just a little christmas tree shaped pcb with blinken lights, but the thing cost $25
01:52:54 <K> wrt to usb extensions - just chop up some cable and make any length you need
01:52:59 <Nothing\> that'd be nice, but i haven't got a printer
01:53:01 <K> usb2 is not that picky
01:53:07 <Nothing\> wrt?
01:53:14 <K> with regard to
01:53:20 <Nothing\> i've got a ton of ethernet cable
01:53:40 <K> that'll work too, i imagine
01:53:54 <Nothing\> i read somewhere ethernet cable is a good source of solid core jumper wire, but when i took one apart it just had regular wires in it, i forget what the non-solid core ones are called
01:54:10 <Nothing\> so now i've got like 50 feet of wire
01:54:58 <Nothing\> that's one thing i still need which is ALSO way overpriced, solid core breadboard jumpers, except they cost about $10 for a little box with maybe 50 jumpers :/
01:55:11 <K> nah, that's insane
01:55:20 <Nothing\> i know, right?
01:55:57 <Nothing\> the surplus store is the only brick and mortar place i can get electrical stuff at, but they don't have anything solid state, it's mostly just passives and switches and crap, but it's sooo overpriced
01:55:58 <K> dunno about how good jumpers will the solid core ethernet make, but a 30m spool will cost you about $20
01:56:26 <Nothing\> what gauge should i look for? i've read everything from 24awg to 32awg, i can't get a straight answer
01:56:53 <Nothing\> i tried measuring the width of my wire with calipers and looking up the awg equivalent but it didn't turn up any results so i dunno
01:58:02 <Nothing\> eventually i just resorted to cutting down the longer jumpers into smaller sections, but using diagonal cutters and a scalpel to cut and strip the wires, it takes about an hour just to cut and strip 20 or so pieces
02:00:15 <Nothing\> i don't think anybody's been as ridiculous with mark up as amazon was though, when i first got into electronics a couple o years ago i didn't know where to go for parts so amazon was the first place i went to, i wound up paying like $20-$25 for a box of i think 150 or so transistors of maybe 10-15 different types, but they were all jellybean parts so the whole lot probbaly didn't cost then any more than like $5
02:01:00 <Nothing\> but the absolute worst was an lm358 dual op amp i tried to get on amazon, it was just 1 chip, but it cost $4.50, and i never even wound up receiving it, meanwhile i bought a pack of 10 lm358s on aliexpress for 80 cents
02:01:33 <Nothing\> makes me think i should just buy up packs of maybe 20-30 different jellybean parts and sell them on amazon for a 1000% mark up
02:03:02 <Nothing\> there wasn't a whole lot of variety on amazon anyways, i couldn't even find any chips, so i wound up just going to ali express cuz they have free shipping, so i can order a $1 pack of resistors and not pay 5x as much for the shipping, but lately i've had a lot of issues with not receiving my packages, i had at least 10 in february alone that went missing :/
02:03:35 <Nothing\> i'm thinking i should probably just start keeping a grocery list of sorts and then when i feel i need enough parts to warrant it, put it an order from newark or some place like that
02:04:19 <Nothing\> i've got a LOT of sketchy looking parts from ali express too, and at least a few batches of chips that were counterfeit since i don't think TI's logo is a picture of the united states
02:04:54 <Nothing\> or my last few batches of chips don't even have any logos on them at all, and the date code on my one 6502 is some time in the middle of the century
02:06:01 <Nothing\> ugh fuck it's supposed to go up to 40 today with the humidity, for the next few days actually
02:06:42 <K> just measured my favourite set of jumper wires
02:06:55 <K> dia is 0.68, which translates to awg 22
02:07:02 <K> if internets can be trusted
02:07:22 <Nothing\> 0.68mm?
02:07:29 <K> mm yes
02:07:33 <Nothing\> lemme check mine again, i forget what they are
02:07:46 <K> do you prefer freedom units/
02:07:47 <Nothing\> is that measuring the core though, or the insulation as well?
02:07:47 <K> ?
02:07:51 <Nothing\> helllllll no
02:07:52 <K> core only
02:08:15 <Nothing\> ugh my metric calipers are upstairs
02:08:33 <K> in inches that is 0.0270
02:09:32 <Nothing\> yeah 0.6mm, which is as precise as it gets, so .22 seems right
02:09:45 <Nothing\> a lot of sites were saying 30 or 32awg, but holy crap is that tiny
02:10:20 <Nothing\> the wires on my battery packs are 0.4mm and they barely make a snug contact with some of my breadboards
02:10:48 <Nothing\> that's a place they need solid core wires if anything, the wires get more and more frayed every time i insert them
02:11:15 <Nothing\> i should tin them, if i had a soldering iron that worked, or solder, i still dunno what's not working right
02:11:26 <Nothing\> it just won't wet anything other than the tip of my soldering iron
02:11:40 <K> tried scraping the wire?
02:11:47 <K> maybe it is copper clad aluminium
02:11:58 <Nothing\> nah i've had it with other materials too
02:12:11 <Nothing\> pretty well anything i try to soldering doesn't wet properly
02:12:17 <K> tried scraping them before?
02:12:19 <Nothing\> i think maybe my solder's old and degraded or something
02:12:22 <Nothing\> no, i didn't
02:12:28 <K> um doubt that solder can go old
02:12:43 <Nothing\> well it's got obvious white oxide on it
02:12:46 <K> i've used my fathers stash, which is 30+ years
02:12:49 <K> works like a charm
02:12:55 <Nothing\> yeah that's about how old this is
02:13:06 <Nothing\> i figure it's either that or the iron just doesn't get hot enough
02:13:15 <Nothing\> at least that's the answer i came to on the internet
02:13:20 <K> what kind of flux?
02:14:10 <Nothing\> well that's another thing, i just rely on the rosin in the core, but it doesn't mix properly with the solder, it just forms into big globs that sit on the surface, so that's probably a big reason right there come to think of it
02:14:17 <K> i was taught to solder using rosin and soldering iron tip made from copper rod
02:14:28 <K> umm, that might not be enough
02:14:41 <Nothing\> yeah now that i think about it, that's probably my problem
02:14:59 <K> is your soldering iron temp controlled?
02:15:03 <Nothing\> hells no
02:15:09 <Nothing\> just a cheapo $20 30w deal
02:15:17 <K> hmm, then there might be another thing
02:15:30 <Nothing\> yeah i've been wanting to get a temp controlled station
02:15:34 <K> it could be too hot and flux just burns away before you get to the business
02:15:43 <Nothing\> i don't have a proper sponge for cleaning either, i dunno what the deal is with that
02:15:55 <Nothing\> just as i figured it would, when i tried using a damp sponge it just melted
02:15:59 <K> i'd advise agains wet sponge
02:16:10 <Nothing\> yeah it seems the thermal shock wouldn't be great for the tip
02:16:28 <Nothing\> and i can't find any of that steel wool or brass or whatever it is anywhere
02:16:33 <K> brass wool
02:16:37 <K> steel is too harsh
02:16:38 <Nothing\> good to know
02:17:03 <Nothing\> speaking of which, one instructible i came across suggested i use a power sander to clean my tips lol
02:17:13 <Nothing\> which is why i avoid instructibles for the life of me
02:17:14 <K> do you have auto-transformer or anthing like that available?
02:17:18 <Nothing\> nah
02:17:22 <K> umm
02:17:25 <Nothing\> i wish i did, i'd have so much fun with one of those
02:17:44 <K> i suspect your iron is running too hot
02:17:58 <K> you could make a crude capacitative dropper
02:17:58 <Nothing\> too hot? even at just 30w?
02:18:15 <K> 30w into a tiny tip is - hot
02:18:21 <Nothing\> yeah i've got a buncha mains rated mylar caps i pulled out of stuff
02:18:26 <Nothing\> yeah that's true actually
02:19:09 <Nothing\> you know one thing i'd love to do is learn more about the relationship between power and temperature, like if i have X amount of power being sunk into a material, how would the temperature change
02:19:32 <Nothing\> thermodynamics has been fascinating me a lot lately
02:19:48 <K> propper maths for it are hard
02:20:11 <Nothing\> yeah i've been trying to learn calculus but it just doesn't click for whatever reason
02:20:43 <Nothing\> i musta watched half a dozen different explanations for differentiation and it only just started to click last night
02:21:03 <Nothing\> that 3 blue 1 brown video on it was a terrible place to start
02:21:10 <K> you have to do it
02:21:24 <K> to actually solve something, on paper, with a pencil
02:21:58 <Nothing\> yeah i've been thinking i should try it out with a square function or something
02:22:27 <Nothing\> it only just clicked last night how you use increasingly shorter secants to work out the limit
02:23:29 <K> http://calculusmadeeasy.org/
02:23:30 <Nothing\> every other explanation threw me off cuz itd just be like "okay you have a function, now draw this tangent line" but it wouldn't explain what the hell the tangent line was, it just seemed to me like a completely arbitrary line they were drawing, and likewise for the secant
02:23:34 <Nothing\> ooh thanks
02:23:40 <K> this is very nice, has excercises
02:23:55 <Nothing\> another problem is i have a lot of trouble reading anything, and learning math without reading is difficult
02:24:06 <K> original was printed in 1910, fwiw
02:24:15 <Nothing\> i've been meaning to go on khan academy, i've always had very good results learning anything on there
02:24:53 <Nothing\> but calculus has always been this sort of holy grail for me, just like building a computer from discrete components
02:25:03 <Nothing\> one of those long term goals
02:25:32 <Nothing\> imagine my surprise when last night i learned that calculus is just considered intermediate level math and there are fields way harder
02:26:13 <K> laplace is next step
02:26:15 <Nothing\> i always imagined calculus to be the sort of final frontier of academic math, like once you learn that, there are no more operations or fields to learn, other than of course getting into the applied aspects of it
02:26:30 <K> if you have grasp of that, engeneering side is pretty much covered
02:26:44 <Nothing\> combinatorics kept coming up as a subject that cames after calculus
02:26:52 <Nothing\> or number/set theory
02:27:07 <K> that does not have a direct relation to ee
02:27:14 <K> in my humble oponion
02:27:21 <K> opon!
02:27:24 <Nothing\> no, it's just general math, no applications
02:27:28 <Nothing\> pure math
02:28:51 <K> in my experience, combinatorics and sets were a bit more intuitive
02:28:54 <Nothing\> GAH
02:29:07 <Nothing\> went to look at spectrum analyzers on ali express, they cost more than a damn scope does
02:29:13 <K> lol
02:29:24 <Nothing\> been trying to do FFTs with a phone but it's not exactly precise
02:29:25 <K> do not look up source-measure units
02:29:31 <Nothing\> it's still really interesting
02:29:41 <Nothing\> what do you mean?
02:30:24 <K> https://www.tek.com/keithley-source-measure-units/keithley-smu-2400-series-sourcemeter
02:30:38 <K> it's like a fancy power supply integrated with a dmm
02:30:55 <Nothing\> jeez even these paltry looking hand held things are a few hundred bucks
02:31:08 <Nothing\> oh okay i've seen stuff like that
02:31:24 <Nothing\> i dunno, i always got the sense a dedicated spectrum analyzer would be better than one intregrated into a DMM
02:31:28 <Nothing\> or DSO
02:32:21 <Nothing\> oh joy, yet another tooth becoming infected
02:32:27 <Nothing\> i lost count but i think that makes 6 now
02:34:11 <Nothing\> ah this game is stupidly addictive, puzzle quest, it's like bejeweled if it were an RPG, definitely an interesting concept
02:36:53 <K> welp
02:36:57 <K> time to go home
02:37:04 <rust_collector> https://www.finn.no/bap/forsale/ad.html?finnkode=133323473
02:37:10 <Nothing\> alright man, have a good one
02:37:28 <rust_collector> GO HOME, K?!!
02:37:49 <K> yea
02:37:56 <rust_collector> good good
02:38:28 <K> whick kronen is it?
02:38:34 <K> danish?
02:38:38 <rust_collector> norwegian
02:39:15 <K> 623.203691 eur
02:39:17 <K> not bad
02:39:26 <rust_collector> who knows?
02:39:31 <rust_collector> it could be very bad
02:39:48 <rust_collector> it says he just did a power on test, and... you can come try it if you want
02:39:56 <Ampera> hi Nothing\
02:39:58 <Ampera> how do
02:49:16 <rust_collector> no?
02:59:50 <rust_collector> I am wondering if I should maybe reainstall the laptop I got from the wife, or maybe I should go do something more or less useful
03:02:20 <Nothing\> hey Ampera how's it going?
03:02:25 <Nothing\> i'm doing pretty good
03:02:33 <Nothing\> staying cool somehow
03:03:04 <Ampera> my mind breaks down by the day :/
03:03:11 <Nothing\> i really need to invest in an AC, but i seem to get pretty good cooling if i just leave the windows open at night and seal up the house and cover the windows during the day, it almost feels like i have AC
03:03:20 <Ampera> dealing with impossible problems with terrible solutions, but I'm trying to scrape through.
03:03:41 <Nothing\> i'm sorry to hear that, it can be easy to get overwhelmed by such things
03:04:05 <Nothing\> which only makes matters worse cuz you end up not doing anything and more problems arise
03:05:26 <Ampera> exactly
03:05:58 <Nothing\> one bit of good news, i learned there was a precedent set in 2016 which basically says if it's longer than 18 months between charges being laid and your trial, the charges get thrown out cuz your charter rights have been violated
03:06:12 <Nothing\> and i'm coming up on 13 months now, so this might work out in my favor
03:06:30 <Ampera> someone will still charge you like nuts for something though
03:06:34 <Ampera> don't you worry
03:06:40 <Nothing\> oh most likely
03:09:09 <Ampera> I'm currently struggling on how I can even integrate a transition into my life, and what I should even do to reciprocate it.
03:09:22 <Ampera> One thing is very good, I now understand exactly what my dysphoria is and why it exists.
03:11:26 <DHess_US> Going to change and rebuild the normal door lock this weekend. it isn't as bad but it isn't good either.
03:13:09 <Nothing\> that's great, that's the first step after realizing something's wrong
03:13:15 <Nothing\> most people don't even get that far
03:14:04 <Ampera> the thing is I now have an insight into something that nobody even knows for definite, why this is a thing.
03:14:22 <Nothing\> although ime, figuring out the cause was the easy part, it's actually taking action to fix the causes that's been giving me tho most trouble, spinning around in circles going nowhere for 15 years because i was trying to avoid any sort of suffering or excessive hardship by taking shortcuts which never amounted to anything
03:14:29 <Ampera> I even understand in others why it exists, and how it, to my surprise, is somewhat similar to homosexuality.
03:14:50 <Ampera> This wasn't easy, but what I discovered is it all has to do with sexual perspective and attraction.
03:15:24 <Ampera> You see, homosexuality is the sexual attraction, featuring the first party as a male, to another male. That's simple enough to understand, replace the characters with others, you have lesbianism and bisexualism
03:15:30 <Nothing\> i realized i've been gravitating towards asexuality lately for some reason, or at least my sex drive's been completely dead
03:15:52 <Nothing\> i don't mind though, i always found having a sex drive to be a terrible imposition, it serves no useful purpose and only distracts me from other things
03:15:54 <Ampera> but, what happens when that perspective features a first party male, but only exists from a female perspective.
03:16:14 <Ampera> As in, what happens if you see sexual attraction from the view of a female, but are a male
03:16:31 <Ampera> That, to the letter, describes my personal position, but you might say, so what, that's just sexual attraction
03:16:57 <Nothing\> Ampera: i think you might be getting too worried about applying labels to these things, although applying labels might help you to better organize thoughts and ideas in your mind, but ime they've never been terribly useful
03:17:04 <Nothing\> though i realize not everybody's experiences are the same
03:17:05 <Ampera> but when I thought about it, sexual perspective dictates the life and culture of everyone in this world, from the dynamic of how you wish to see your own body, to how you wish to interact in a social consideration.
03:17:19 <Ampera> I'm not applying, labels, I'm trying to describe my issue
03:17:39 <Nothing\> hrm, i wonder if there's any difference, or what the difference is
03:17:49 <Ampera> From an immutable position, I experience the concept of sexual attraction from a female perspective.
03:17:51 <Nothing\> i'm not arguing with you, i just had a tangent thought wondering about that
03:18:19 <Ampera> That would explain exactly everything that it effects, and why I am exhibiting every single symptom and urge that I have
03:18:43 <Nothing\> that's an interesting take, it sounds to me like you think about your situation and mindset and the causes of them almost as obsessively as i do, if not more
03:18:51 <Ampera> It doesn't explain all people's perspectives, and there are still thousands of misdiagnosed people who got pushed into a transition they didn't need.
03:18:57 <Nothing\> though lately i've not done it as much cuz it's upsetting
03:19:10 <Ampera> I have done almost nothing but focus on this specific issue for the past five years.
03:19:16 <Nothing\> Ampera: or worse, people who are legally persecuted for it
03:19:19 <Nothing\> legally/socially
03:19:35 <Nothing\> like those places under sharia law where you can be put to death, what kinda bullshit is that
03:19:53 <Ampera> The issue I had is to what the changes that seemed attractive mattered to me. Why would I want to look feminine, have a different voice, look, and be socially accepted as such?
03:19:59 <Nothing\> i don't even know how somebody can justify putting somebody to death for their sexual preference
03:20:16 <Nothing\> come to think of it, the term sexual preference is almost misleading because it sounds like it's a decision
03:20:21 <Ampera> Simply because those aspects are part of the intensely intricate rituals surrounding the unchanging pure and single goal of any society, to reproduce.
03:20:39 <Ampera> Preference is an antonym to decision.
03:20:48 <Ampera> If I prefer something, that's because I like it better, not because I choose to like it better
03:21:21 <Nothing\> yeah that's true actually, there are tons of things i wish i could enjoy which i don't so i guess it's not really a choice what you prefer
03:21:31 <Nothing\> in general, not specifically with sexual orientation
03:21:42 <Ampera> I like oranges, that's not a choice, I just like them.
03:21:48 <Ampera> I dislike vegetables, that's not a choice, I just do not like them.
03:21:56 <Nothing\> i wonder if you could make yourself like something by choice though
03:22:03 <Nothing\> or how you could even go about doing that
03:22:09 <Nothing\> operant conditioning or something maybe
03:22:13 <Ampera> Some easier than other, There are stimuli unpleasant you can get used to.
03:22:16 <Nothing\> ie pavlov's dog
03:22:18 <Ampera> Acquired tastes are like that.
03:22:39 <Ampera> If I ate enough vegetables, and forced them down enough, I would likely eventually break through my intense displeasure of them
03:22:55 <Ampera> the issue is when you try to alter the nigh hard wired impulses and desires present within the human mind
03:23:08 <Nothing\> i dunno about that, i tend to dislike something the more often i eat it
03:23:16 <Ampera> With enough abuse and torture of the mind, anything may be possible, but it's not as easy as eating more pears.
03:23:29 <Ampera> ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
03:23:51 <Nothing\> heh i remember when i was little, my grandparents tricked me into liking canned brown beans by feeding me that old line about how they'll make me big and strong like my grandfather
03:23:55 <Nothing\> and somehow it worked
03:24:06 <Ampera> lol
03:24:12 <Nothing\> or my great aunt got me to like red peppers cuz she told me they taste sweeter than most peppers, which they do
03:24:17 <Nothing\> and i learned to appreciate that quality of them
03:24:24 <Ampera> Do you understand what I was saying though?
03:24:35 <Nothing\> oh yeah of course
03:25:01 <Nothing\> but i've gotta wonder if the person would genuinely change their preference or if they would just change the outward appearance for the sake of not being hassled
03:25:08 <Ampera> While this is a positive, because I now have ample justification for the things I wish to do, that makes it worse because I know it's very hard to fight it.
03:25:24 <Ampera> It's happened. Homosexuality never went away, people always had it.
03:25:44 <Ampera> Yet, many hid it, many entered into unhappy marriages with children, and found some way to push it behind themselves.
03:25:50 <Nothing\> yeah i can see it being one of those things where the more you fight it, the stronger it gets
03:26:00 <Ampera> I may yet be able to do the same, but either path I take, I will face nothing but pain.
03:26:08 <Ampera> The only difference is I get different benefits out of it.
03:26:38 <Ampera> My life or my livelihood. Neither would be completely discarded, but only one can be given the ultimate attention it so dearly needs.
03:26:54 <Nothing\> i get the same thing with intrusive thoughts from being OCD, i'll get terrible thoughts of gruesome things, like for instance imagining my mother being brutally murdered, and of course such thoughts are upsetting, so i try to fight them, but the more i fight them the stronger they get, so i found the best thing to do is to just let it be and they'll eventually play out
03:27:15 <Nothing\> but for some reason if i try to resist, it'll not only be more aggressive, but it'll happen more frequently as well
03:27:32 <Nothing\> it's not exactly the same thing as sexual urges, but that's how i imagine it is
03:27:48 <Ampera> I have similar thoughts, my mind is a horrifically cruel contraption.
03:28:03 <Ampera> I've imagined people around me being injured by my own hands, terrible urges to do terrible things.
03:28:16 <Ampera> Sometimes even to the point of them being abnormal, but then I realized, these are primal.
03:28:19 <Nothing\> but re: the pain no matter what path you take, that's the case with life in general, though the amount of pain may be very different
03:28:29 <Ampera> I channel them in a way that doesn't equate in action, and I do not do these things.
03:28:36 <Nothing\> the fact that existence is suffering is a central concept in buddhism even
03:28:39 <Ampera> Yet I don't object to the idea of thinking about them, I cannot stop that.
03:28:51 <Nothing\> yeah it's funny how that works
03:29:13 <Ampera> It's pain in different ways. I've learned to respect pain in a very different light than many people otherwise innocent of it may have had to deal with.
03:29:25 <Nothing\> it's almost like your brain isn't entirely your own, like there's some other entity who thinks freely about whatever they want, and if you try to resist them they just get stronger
03:29:29 <Ampera> To some, pain is simply a reminder not to hurt yourself, a way to make breaking a leg something you are not eager to do.
03:29:43 <Ampera> Ah, I've found that two. I've discovered that the brain is actually two minds.
03:29:54 <Ampera> Your rational and subjective conscious.
03:29:58 <Nothing\> pain scares me, pain being psychological or physical
03:30:00 <Ampera> Think of a food that you really like, but is bad for you.
03:30:19 <Ampera> It's got to exist, everyone has one.
03:30:30 <Ampera> Imagine being presented with it, in that moment, your two different minds are in conflict.
03:30:36 <Nothing\> having been through severe withdrawal, which is the worst i've ever felt in my life made me realize just how much suffering i'm capable of experiencing, which absolutely terrifies me
03:30:40 <Ampera> Your subjective mind wishes to experience pleasure, that's all it understands
03:30:51 <Nothing\> i consider it a terrible liability to inhabit a body capable of feeling such suffering
03:30:53 <Ampera> but your rational mind knows that the pleasure you would experience is negative.
03:31:05 <Nothing\> yes exactly
03:31:19 <Ampera> The thing is, both have to work together, and each can find ways to override the other.
03:31:19 <Nothing\> i've come to realize though, we need to experience pain in order to experience pleasure
03:31:26 <Ampera> Pleasure is strong, but rationale is strong.
03:31:40 <Ampera> Of course, we are people of comparisons, that's how the very universe works.
03:32:08 <Ampera> If you live a monotonous life with no pain, you won't see much pleasure, as you do not have anything to compare your happiness to.
03:32:31 <Ampera> Yet if you know true pain, true agony of the body or mind, your life's happy moments are all the more valuable and pleasurable.
03:32:32 <Nothing\> if you experience nothing but pleasure, it becomes the norm, so it stops being pleasurable and becomes more a neutral experience, but if you have negative experiences peppered throughout, you have a lower baseline to compare the good events, so the difference is greater, if that makes sense
03:32:40 <Ampera> Aye.
03:32:59 <Ampera> There are people who loose the fight between rationale and subjection.
03:33:05 <Nothing\> likewise, death needs to exist to give value to life, cuz if nobody died life wouldn't have nearly as much value as we put on it now
03:33:15 <Ampera> My mother is a sad example, where she has lost the ability to care, not simply for other people, but for herself.
03:33:19 <Nothing\> oh yeah, i lost big time with my drug addiction
03:33:28 <Nothing\> addiction's a perfect example of that
03:33:29 <Ampera> She is lost in a forest of pleasures that will take each and every bite out of her.
03:33:35 <Ampera> That's what she faces
03:33:37 <Ampera> but on all fronts.
03:33:45 <Nothing\> actually your idea is very similar to freud's idea of the id/ego
03:33:56 <Ampera> Addiction to that one sensation that keeps her highs at the very least a non painful buzz.
03:34:23 <Ampera> As for pain, I know pain, I understand it.
03:34:37 <Nothing\> the id is the part of your mind which cares only about pleasure, where the ego is the more conscious part of you which wants healthier sources of pleasure, family, love, a stable job, stuff like that, where all the id wants is pleasure at any expense
03:34:39 <Ampera> It's very cliche to say the only thing I fear is fear itself, but I've found that it's true.
03:34:51 <Nothing\> oh yeah i know exactly what you mean
03:34:57 <Ampera> I do not fear experiencing pain, I fear the idea of fearing it, because that is what truly keeps me down.
03:35:04 <Nothing\> i fear my own mind more than anything else
03:35:15 <Ampera> The natural human inhibition to not do to yourself what so dearly hurts, even if it's exactly what is good for you.
03:35:21 <Ampera> Breaking your leg to save your life.
03:35:45 <Nothing\> it's amazing what people can do when they have no choice
03:36:04 <Ampera> That's what I might worry about the most.
03:36:17 <Ampera> I know that whatever I do, I have the energy and the mind to make it amazing.
03:36:50 <Ampera> but I am at the end of my river, to a fork's wedge that I am hanging on tightly to, being dragged ferociously by either current, each as awesome as the other
03:36:54 <Nothing\> i find with anxiety regarding specific events, the anticipation beforehand is almost always worse than the actual event itself, but the frustrating thing is even if i consciously tell myself this, i still get anxious, maybe even more so
03:37:00 <Ampera> yet I do not know which way to fall as I feel my grip slipping
03:37:07 <Ampera> I cannot stay on the edge forever.
03:37:16 <Nothing\> damned if you do and damned if you don't
03:37:26 <Nothing\> it's just a matter of which path is less difficult
03:37:49 <Ampera> Neither path is
03:37:53 <Nothing\> but difficulty shoudn't necessarily be viewed as a negative, if everything were easy we'd all be weak
03:37:56 <Ampera> it's not a matter of one flight of stairs or two
03:38:04 <Nothing\> anything worth having in life will be difficult
03:38:15 <Ampera> Both paths are equally difficult, as they are fighting a true parity of damnation and pleasure
03:38:24 <Nothing\> and struggling through such situations makes us stronger people
03:38:25 <Ampera> which is why choosing is so hard
03:38:45 <Ampera> the only thing is which do I want to face better, and how best can I make of the situation I would entrench myself in
03:40:03 <Nothing\> man you're really fortunate you never had problems with drugs, the sort of situation you're in is exactly the sort of thing that starts people on the road to addiction, especially at your age
03:40:41 <Ampera> What is sober if you can't even keep your life together :P
03:46:40 <Nothing\> well, it's a lot better than being fucked up and not being able to keep anything together
03:47:31 <Nothing\> as hard as everything is, being addicted to drugs makes it so much worse cuz you not only neglect things which need your attention, but you expend what resources you have got on maintaining your addiction, rather than dealing with problems
03:48:19 <Nothing\> as bad as things are, they can always be worse, although that never gave me much solace personally
03:48:48 <Ampera> I'm going to try to reflect this on a few other people, see if my reasoning still holds true.
03:49:32 <Nothing\> that's a good idea, i never saw value in talking to others about my problems, but it really can provide a much needed different perspective on things
03:49:47 <Ampera> I talk to people in hopes of disagreeing with them.
03:50:01 <Ampera> Other people may know things I do not, and be able to see the flaws in my reasoning.
03:50:36 <Nothing\> that too, it's extremely difficult, if not impossible to analyze your life in an objective manner
03:51:26 <Nothing\> yay i got this LCD module wired up finally, hooked it up to some dip switches so i can manually enter binary commands and play around with it and hopefully learn how to use it
03:52:34 <Nothing\> i used to know how to use lcd character displays enough to be able to print messages on them, but i long since forgot, but i came across the 8 bit guy video that introduced me the concept the other day so i got the urge to learn them again
03:52:51 <Nothing\> they're really neat little things
03:53:04 <Nothing\> just those like, 2x16 lcds
03:54:00 <Ampera> It depends on the interface
03:54:12 <Ampera> parallel or serial, but it's literally just transmitting the character code.
03:54:22 <rust_collector> have you done anything with bare lcds?
03:54:25 <Nothing\> yeah i've got one with a serial adapter on it, but i don't like it
03:54:26 <Ampera> There's usually some special codes for things like clear screen, move cursor.
03:54:48 <Ampera> Not sure why you wouldn't, usually they are asynchronous, and you can just plop characters into them.
03:54:48 <Nothing\> rust_collector: by bare do you mean without any driver at all, or you mean the character displays like i was talking about?
03:55:09 <rust_collector> just the screen, no driver
03:55:15 <Ampera> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZRL8luuPb8
03:55:22 <Ampera> This series is very good.
03:55:56 <Nothing\> rust_collector: nope, but looking at the datasheet for the 2 driver chips on this, the st7066 and st7065, the pinouts are huge
03:56:18 <Nothing\> Ampera: yeah 8 bit guy put out a 3 part series on them that taught me everything i needed to play with them myself
03:56:22 <rust_collector> I think I have a small one, from an old radio/cd player. I am not sure why I kept it, but I guess that is something to look into
03:56:47 <Nothing\> another issue is i didn't have a proper set up for my lcd module, it was just bare parts wired to a breadboard so i was constantly having issues with loose connections
03:57:08 <Ampera> I'd love to get a nice VFD character display to mess with
03:57:09 <Nothing\> rust_collector: dave made a video about how to drive LCDs
03:57:14 <Ampera> one with an easy serial bitmap interface would be even better.
03:57:18 <Nothing\> oh man Ampera that'd be awesome
03:57:27 <Ampera> I /love/ VFDs.
03:57:36 <Nothing\> but i think those things are pretty hard to drive unless yeah, you have some sort of an interface
03:57:47 <Ampera> Maybe I should keep an eye out for shops who are about to eat shit, and see if I can pick up their cash registers through liquidation
03:58:33 <Nothing\> i've been trying to figure out what kind of display they used on my mom's car stereo, it has the bluish green tint of a VFD, but there are no wires visible between the pixels where you can normally see the grid for the pixels on a VFD
03:58:51 <Nothing\> Ampera: there ya go, or i bet you could buy one on ebay pretty cheap
03:59:35 <Ampera> oh man nothing, when my phone charges I'm gonna take a picture of my car
03:59:37 <Ampera> with the stereo on
03:59:40 <Ampera> you'll love it
03:59:50 <Nothing\> oh yeah?
03:59:58 <rust_collector> is it all blurry?
04:00:13 <Ampera> No, it's a beautiful VFD
04:00:19 <Ampera> I really am happy with my new car
04:00:54 <rust_collector> I tend to like the shittiest cars. I get attached to them, in a weird way.
04:01:19 <Nothing\> gah i hate the blue color on these metal film resistors, it makes it so much harder to read the codes
04:01:34 <Nothing\> i keep mixing up my 10k resistors with 220s cuz they look almost identical, save for one band
04:01:42 <rust_collector> Like my old peugeot, there was always something wrong with it, and I was constantly fixing stuff, but I miss that pos
04:02:43 <Nothing\> alright, almost got this all wired up, i just need to figure out what the heck these A and K pins are for, obviously anode and cathode something
04:03:41 <Nothing\> i'm not even sure what these displays are called, i have 2 separate datasheets for what sounds like the same display
04:04:00 <rust_collector> rodney
04:04:09 <Nothing\> there's a 1602a and then there's hd44780
04:12:30 <rust_collector> so, as my mower died yesterday... I went and fixed an old snow blower... yeah mr brain.
04:14:44 <rust_collector> at least that does free up the spare blowers, so I junked one of them, and the engine from that will be the start of my little tractor
04:15:24 <rust_collector> Which, when I was typing, made me think of my little pony. maybe the boy version of my little pony
04:37:19 <rust_collector> Now I wonder how impossible it is to find a larger capacity ram chip, that can replace a smaller one
04:47:55 <Nothing\> heh i've got a buncha 2kb chips here, those hm6116 chips
04:48:23 <Nothing\> i really like them cuz you don't need a clock, they're asynchronous so you just hook up the address, data and control lines and you're good to go
04:48:33 <Nothing\> it's the same chip they used in the nes
04:48:45 <rust_collector> Ah, great
04:48:55 <rust_collector> one more of the things I never had, lol
04:51:24 <rust_collector> I would like to upgrade the ram on my old thin client. it has no slot, and... well. It actually works fine as a desktop, but it runs out of ram very quickly. iIrc, it has 128mb, and you can use 105 of them.
04:51:45 <rust_collector> the rest is for the graphics, I think it was
04:52:12 <rust_collector> it is one of those projects that makes no sense, but I still want to do
04:53:17 <rust_collector> I did use it with a custom linux install, and it was working fine, just no "firefox or chrome" sort of browsers.
04:53:33 <rust_collector> the thing runs at 389mhz, iIrc
04:55:48 <rust_collector> i have too many computer things. I will never use most of them
06:06:17 Join: Guest|35828 ([email protected]) to #EEVblog
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06:23:56 <DHess_US> Now the deadbolt actually looks like it was installed by someone who knew what they were doing.
08:21:25 <EEVBlog1> New EEVBlog Tweet: NEW EEVblog Video! EEVblog #1226 - How To Get Better Accuracy On Your Oscilloscope https://t.co/Ed1gF2jFZe
09:31:08 Quit: Nothing\ ([email protected]) Quit: Leaving
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11:27:02 <Guest|60059> Hey
11:27:23 <Guest|60059> Anyone online?
11:27:32 * Guest|60059 thinks he is alone
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12:40:18 <EEVBlog1> New EEVBlog Tweet: RT @JedadiahLeland: Mad Magazine Is Shutting Down https://t.co/ltKKAj62L1 https://t.co/UX3fkKgeZI
12:43:19 <EEVBlog1> New EEVBlog Tweet: Mad magazine is shutting down. They couldn't compete with the absolute madness of current society and social media. https://t.co/PjcmDsBJKl
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19:27:53 <K> hello
19:28:03 <rust_collector> hullo
20:06:58 <Halcyon> Ampera, you around?
20:15:54 <steve30> hello
20:16:00 <Halcyon> Hey Steve
20:16:28 <steve30> I'm just having a short break from doing my patio
20:17:04 <DHess_US> https://gunfreezone.net/wp-content/uploads/2019/06/funny-doormat.jpg
20:18:29 <steve30> hehe :)
20:18:48 <rust_collector> I am so glad they mentioned not gluing the mat to pregnant women, because I think I maybe did that once, and it was not a great experience
20:22:22 <DHess_US> I thought it said not to glue it to pregnant women.
20:23:10 <rust_collector> yes, they have probably updated their tag, because I always read those on mats
20:51:10 <Halcyon> Steve, do you feel like a game of cards against humanity?
22:50:05 * steve30 coffees again
23:11:47 Quit: DogWomble ([email protected]) Ping timeout: 121 seconds
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23:12:09 Mode: (by ChanOP) +o DogWomble
23:47:57 <rust_collector> putting a plastic pressure container almost one finger away from the exhaust manifold seems like a great idea
23:49:01 <rust_collector> said only the renault/nissan/opel engineer. I hope
23:58:30 <K> what could go wrong?
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